Journal Entry: Write Your Own Instruction Manual to Find the Love you Want
How You Would like Others to Treat you? How would you like to treat yourself? How do you reward yourself? How do you approve and appreciate yourself?
How to Write Your Own Instruction Manual for Treatment
Creating an instruction manual for how you want to be treated by others and yourself is a valuable exercise in self-awareness and self-advocacy. Follow these steps to develop a comprehensive guide:
Step 1: Self-Reflection
Identify Your Values: Consider what values are most important to you. This could include respect, kindness, honesty, or support.
Assess Past Experiences: Reflect on past interactions. Identify what made you feel valued and what felt disrespectful or harmful.
Step 2: Define Your Needs
What You Need from Others: Write down specific behaviors that you appreciate from people around you. For instance, you might want clear communication, empathy, or recognition of your efforts.
What You Need from Yourself: List out how you want to treat yourself. This may involve self-care practices, positive self-talk, or setting healthy boundaries.
Step 3: Draft the Manual
Format: Choose a format that works for you (bullet points, paragraphs, charts). Consider creating sections for treatment by others and treatment by self.
Be Specific: For each item on your list, include examples. For instance, “I want to be greeted warmly by my friends” or “I commit to taking breaks during my workday.”
Step 4: Use Positive Language
Frame your statements in a positive light. Instead of saying “I don’t want to be ignored,” say “I appreciate when my contributions are acknowledged.”
Step 5: Request Feedback
Share your preliminary manual with someone you trust. Ask for their perspective on clarity and completeness. Adjust your manual based on their constructive feedback.
Step 6: Revise and Finalize
Refine your draft, ensuring that it genuinely reflects your desires and boundaries. This may take multiple iterations.
Step 7: Create an Action Plan
For each item in your manual, outline actionable steps to encourage the treatment you desire. This could be having open conversations with others or practicing self-affirmations.
Step 8: Regularly Review and Update
Set a schedule to review your manual—perhaps quarterly. Reflect on whether your needs have changed and update the document as necessary.
Step 9: Share as Needed
Decide if, and when, you want to share your manual with others in your life. Consider this as part of having healthy conversations about your needs.
Step 10: Practice Self-Advocacy
As you follow your manual, remember that advocating for your needs is vital. Be prepared to communicate your expectations with others and enforce the personal boundaries you’ve established.
